Stop chasing your dreams, do this instead

We don't get anywhere by pursuing our dreams. What actually drives us forward is something far simpler, the desperate need to avoid failure.

We are creatures of habit and seek comfort. The only thing that makes us move is avoiding discomfort, not chasing greater comfort.

We study before a big test not to pass it, but to avoid failing it.

A straight-A student gets straight A's only because they absolutely refuse to get a B.

Salespeople work hard not to make a sale, but to avoid the failure of not making a sale and taking home a $0 commission check.

This is why most people finally shift into overdrive once they have others for whom they become responsible: a family, a business partner. They refuse to let their family lose their home, let their business partner down, or force their kids to start the new school year in last year's shoes.

What does a personal trainer offer you in fitness? Beyond fitness advice, you'll find that most people hire a trainer to force themselves to go to the gym. To avoid wasting the cost of the session and to save face.

I am willing to make a bet that the market for accountability in all forms is going to grow exponentially over the coming years.

The desire to avoid looking like a quitter or failure to the person holding you accountable, and losing money in the process, will completely override your momentary comfort when you would otherwise choose not to do the thing you said you wanted to do.

When I say "don't chase your dreams," this is not to say that there isn't immense value in picking a goal and sticking to it without ever quitting.

But what will really keep you going and help you find success is not "I will get this," it's "I refuse to fail at getting this, and if I quit now, I am failing."

Tucker Carlson said, "Men will do nothing unless they have to. But once they have to, they will do anything." This is a fantastic quote, and it applies to all people.

Whatever you set as your baseline non-negotiable, the floor you will never accept falling below, becomes the actual level you achieve. Stop chasing dreams. Start refusing to fail. Refusal of falling short is the most reliable fuel you'll ever find.