Stop Sabotaging Yourself

People want to help you.

You're stopping them.

Every time you say "Sorry to bother you," you're telling them this is a bother.

Every time you say "I know you're busy," you're reminding them they don't have time.

Every time you say "Just five minutes," you're lying and they know it.

Stop sabotaging yourself.

Instead, say this:

"When it comes to solving a problem like this, you’re the one I know who it did, will you help?"

“Do you have any guidance on this topic, as I know you’ve been through it?"

"Would you happen to know anyone in this industry who I can meet? You usually know the right people"

Recognizing their expertise.

Ask for what you actually need.

People tend to give you more than you ask for, so get the first ask out of the way as soon as possible.

Important follow up:

People tend to ask for help and then disappear.

Professionals close the loop.

Always follow up with:

"Your advice worked. I got the promotion."

"I followed your suggestion. The client signed."

"You were right. Thank you."

When people see their help mattered, they want to help you again.

Here's what this is really about:

Help is an investment.

You are asking them to invest in you.

So, ask clearly and thoroughly.

Get the ask out of the way as soon as possible to respect their time.

When you use someone's help well, you become worth investing in.

Every interaction is an audition for the next one.

Make sure you pass.